10 September 2007

I didn't realize being a slacker was an option

Okay. My husband is a reasonably intelligent man. He has the paperwork to prove it. He can't be stupid.

Can he?

Last weekend he took the The Nice Kid to a party. I wrote down the directions and yes, it was in the middle of nowhere. Big deal.

The directions read: Cross Happy Hollow Bridge. Turn left at the gas station. Turn left on Waters Edge Drive. Fourth house on the left. The local phone number was written under the directions, JUST IN CASE.

I got a phone call. It was TNK. "Mom, if we're in St. Joe, have we gone too far?"

That would be St. Joseph. TENNESSEE. And that's NOT the state we live in.

Yes, you've gone too far. That's why I wrote down the LOCAL number. Call them and find out where you are.

Nothing was mentioned when he got home. That night, we're in bed watching television and I started questioning him about where these people lived and what the setup was (they have these imported horses that are like small Clydesdales). And he's telling me about where it is and then, this man whose genes my children carry, said, "It's out in the country. The turn is in a curve and there aren't any signs telling you if you missed it."

You know how you do a mental doubletake? And you're sitting there wondering if he really SAID what you think he just said, or maybe you're just having a bourbon moment? HAVE YOU EVER IN YOUR LIFE SEEN A SIGN SAYING, "YOU JUST MISSED WATERS EDGE DRIVE."?

I didn't say anything. I started to get up and write this down, just in case I was confused...but I wasn't. And the next day I realized...that's just the man shit. Nothing, by george, is HIS fault. Sure, he missed the turn. BUT THERE WEREN'T ANY SIGNS!

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