17 October 2007

Taco Hell!


I started working out the first week of July. Since then I’ve lost 22 lbs (yeah me!). I was forced into this “lifestyle” for several different reasons. The biggest I suppose would be my husband’s recent appointment to General Manager of a local gym. I shuddered at the thought of being introduced as the wife of a gym manager and people thinking to themselves, “oh really, has she every seen the inside of this gym?” Anyway, I go 5, yes, 5 days a week to said gym to work various body parts and do cardio. (Cardio-that’s what the gym rats call walking or climbing to nowhere for 45 minutes) I do this in conjunction with eating “clean” a term my husband uses to mean eating things that have no taste and provide no joy in my life.

I’m telling you this to get to my point. For 15 weeks I’ve more of less eaten “clean” and have had a few temptations to overcome but nothing I couldn’t handle. Until yesterday that is. I’m on my way home from the gym, no less, and happen to pass a Taco Bell. I look up to the marquee and see “IT’S BACK! THE CHILI CHEESE BURRITO!” Oh God No! Not the chili cheese burrito!

Back about 7 or 8 years ago I was in the drive thru of the very same Taco Bell and tried to order a chili cheese burrito, my very favorite Taco Bell item, only to be told they had been discontinued. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! I’m so angry I don’t even want to think about what else I can order in it’s place so I try to pull out of the drive thru which has me hemmed in like a cow going to slaughter. I can’t just pull out and drive around. I can’t go forward because there are cars in front of me. My only alternative is to back up. So I back up, but not far enough, apparently. As I go to turn out of the drive thru, my rear tires go up on the median at an angle and one goes off the other side. I now have two front tires in the drive thru, one rear tire on the median and one rear tire hanging off into space. Basically, I’m stuck! I think, no problem, I have front wheel drive. So I hit the gas and my tires spin and spin and spin going no where fast and I’m getting madder and madder by the second. I’m churning up smoke like no body’s business and still there I sit. Fortunately for me, there was a very large, very hungry bubba who pulled up in a truck and needed his Nacho Bell Grande in a bad way so he got out to help. After a couple of pushes from my Good Samaritan I’m on my way, hungry and humiliated, swearing I would NEVER eat Taco Bell again! Well, we all know how long that lasted.

I drive past the evil Taco Bell with a Happy Meal beside me because my 2 year old, freshly over a nasty stomach virus, won’t eat anything else at the moment (don't throw stones unless you have walked a mile in my shoes). So I already have to smell McDonald’s French fries and a hot steamy cheeseburger when I see this sign. All my will power starts to come undone. I hesitate on the gas but I speed past to the sanctuary of my home. Needless to day, I’m still dreaming of that damn chili cheese burrito. Pray for me folks.

City Girl, love ya babe and hope you’re doing great! Thanks for asking me to fill in while you're on sabbatical and thanks to Country Girl for allowing me to vent along side her this week.

2 comments:

Country Girl said...

Honey, you turn your ass around RIGHT NOW and go back and get you a chili cheese burrito...there's an exponential thing going on here wherein if you DON'T, it will take about 43 of them to satisfy the craving. Go get one. Eat it slowly. Go do an extra mile on one of those torture machines and leave smiling smugly.

cometgirl said...

You are soooo right! On any other day I would have pulled my ass right in there and proudly ordered one but I slipped terribly Mon nite and had about 1/2 a pizza not knowing the chili cheese burrito was back! I have planned for a reunion this weekend as well as an additional torture session on the stair climber which I affectional call "The Beast".