12 December 2007

It's REALLY not me!

The Nice Kid is ailing with a cold, but because mid-terms start tomorrow we're morally obligated to send her to school to spread germs and confusion. But I did let her sleep in and then it took another 30 minutes to get her unstopped-up, so on the way home it was late enough that I stopped to buy beer so I didn't have to do it this afternoon.

There is a letter, a notice and a sign at the package store. This little package store, which sets at the edge of the dry part of the county, has always given free ice. From Day One. You buy, they give you however much ice it takes to fill up your cooler. No big deal...it's just ice.

The displayed letter explains how the ABC board (that would be Alabama Beverage Control, because you have to CONTROL that shit or it takes out an unsecured home mortgage) has decreed that...package stores can't give away ice. If they do, they'll be fined and/or lose their licenses. I stood there waiting on the clerk and pondered the beauracracy involved in getting that specific amendment/law/letter/ordinance passed, the paperwork and manpower involved, the expense of notifying every alcohol sales outlet within the state and then oh, yeah. Enforcement. The tax dollars (mine and yours but I'm only worried about mine) involved in this specific action which might, just MAYBE, precipitate the end of the world.

Go figure.

So I leave and I'm almost home and I pass through the small incorporated town that adjoins our larger unincorporated town. The incorporated town (IT) has a police force. At the very end of the city limits sits the largest high school in this county. The speed limit through IT is 55 mph, which is a little fast but that's the law. When you get to the property line of the high school, the speed limit goes up to 65 mph, except for when those lights are blinking. When the speed limits were changed, IT asked the state to keep the speed limit at 55mph through the school zone and guess what? Can't do it. Not on the books. Violates what IS on the books. So as you top that little rise and approach the three exits from that school, make sure you kick it in. It's your right.

Just keep in mind that if you have an accident? You can't pack your injuries in ice.

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