28 October 2009

Back to Politics

* I'm going to spend next weekend in London (small part of a much larger work trip) at which time our Blogger BFF Le Laquet is going to make sure I'm well fed, by meeting me for dinner at a Pakistani restaurant.

Does an American consuming Pakistani cuisine on foreign-but-friendly soil make me an Enemy of The State? Will I be allowed to return home? Stay tuned.

* What if I go to a Persian restaurant while I'm in Frankfurt? Does Angela Merkel cancel out Mahmoud I'm-a-dinner-jacket?

* My Hamid Karzai Halloween costume totally fell through when I couldn't find the right hat.

* Thanks, Sarah Palin, now I have to burn my red fleece jacket. Bitch ruins everything.

* What's the opposite of the Midas Touch? The Palin Touch. Copyright CityGirl 2009.

* I just realized why I'm not bankrupt: I'm "too big to fail." Seriously, over the past 15 years, the more weight I've gained, the better I've done. Coincidence? I think not. Pass me a Twinkie.

* Less funny point: So Obama got the Nobel prize for peace. Let's all get over it. Have you heard of Austin Heap and Haystack? If you haven't, you should. Makes me ask myself what the hell I've done lately for the greater good.

* I'm breaking up with the mainstream media. It isn't you...it's me. Okay, yeah, it's you. Loser.

Henceforth, all information about the outside world is going to come from The Daily Show, Wonkette and The Onion. I'll be stoopider, but happier. Join me, won't you?

9 comments:

Country Girl said...

I an in AWE. Take lots & lots of pictures. I'll be the one STILL sitting at the computer trying to figure out how to take TNK's phone away. Online. Not working too good for me right now ;)

Nancy said...

I just stopped by from ExPat's site and I'm so glad I did. You made me LOL! Loved the Sarah Palin and red jacket. And I'm joining you in breaking up with the mainstream media! Now, I'm off to the Onion.

Melissa said...

MSM and I have been broken up for quite some time. I don't remember the last time I listened to a major network or read a major magazine. Unless you count NPR.

Have fun in London. Hope they let you back in!

Comet Girl said...

What's that saying? Oh yeah, Fat and Happy! Have a great trip! I'm so jealous. Hook a sista up with a souvenir would ya?
P.S. You're SO not fat. If you are, then so am I :wink.

Kelly @ Dare to be Domestic said...

I just found your blog in reading the new issue of NO'ALA for December and I'm so excited. I got a bit worried when I saw the Palin picture, but I was calmed by the comment and will forge ahead and read more! :) I'm happy to be following such a forward thinking/speaking woman! ox

Le laquet said...

Hey .. NO and who cares 'cause Tayyubs is out of this world!!!!!!!!!

Indigo said...

What? What? What!!! You are going to visit Jo??? Omg. I'm so insanely jealous right now.

*mingling*

Tendrils said...

OMG, I almost snorted my coffee right out my nose reading your post! Especially about giving up your fleece!

I too have given up on mainstream media. Let's all Hail Jon Stewart! :)

fatboyfat said...

Blimey - you're only going to be 100-odd miles away!

I shall alert the media...