...or me at mass.
Never mind that I've had a kid in Catholic school for...'94. How long's that been? Fifteen years? Everytime I go to mass, someone threatens to brand a large "P" on my forehead because...I keep getting confused. Or in this morning's case, when my mom was there, too...tickled. We good lapsed Methodists seem to be a little short on reverence. Or at least, slow learners.
Catholics still take communion from a communal cup (you think?). And in this day and time (there were only five kids present in pre-K because of illness) this just freaks OUT some Methodists. Methodists use those tiny little individual glasses in silver holders...although now, they're plastic and we just throw them away each week.
So Father picks up the first chalice, fills it with wine and then...pours in a few drops from another bottle. My mother leaned over and said, "I hope to GOD that was an antibiotic." And I snickered, "Well, in HERE it is. Holy water." We snorted and laughed into our hands and enjoyed ourselves immensely. We may be IGNORANT but hey, we're funny.
THEN, they say the Lord's Prayer. Now, I shut my kids up about this REAL quick a long time ago. But. Protestants have a phrase, "For thine is the kingdom, the power and the glory, forever," stuck onto the end of the Lord's Prayer. So you can always TELL where the Protestants are sitting because, after "Deliver us from evil," the Catholics STOP. And the Methodists keep praying. It's possible we need more help ;)
First time my kids ever complained I explained in NO uncertain terms...IT'S THE LORD'S PRAYER. They had it first.
But we still forgot and kept going and then snickered at our ignorance some more. Sheesh...you can't take some people ANYWHERE.
When it was over, I felt better. (Mean Girl dilemmas in The Institution.) Fourth grade (The Not Nice Kid's class) held mass today, which means our kids read and sang. After attending one of these masses you KNOW why Catholics are always Catholics...the kids are involved from day one. It's not like Methodists, where the kids are expected to show up, shut up and sit down...mass is a communal effort and at some point in time, everyone participates. It works very well.
And besides, these parents pack coolers for BIRTHDAY PARTIES. You gotta love them that are right with God. I know I'm fortunate to have known them.