17 December 2009

In Which I Begin Lying About My Age

My age has never, ever bothered me.

Until recently.

Maybe it's all the lusting after young men.
(I'm looking at you, Robert Pattinson - purrrrrr).

Maybe it's that we're hiring what appear to be children at work and suddenly I'm one of the the oldest hens in the coop.

Or *maybe* it's that everyone else's obsession with A Number, which I've always been able to laugh at and ignore, is finally getting to me.

Whatever drove me to it - the devil made me do it? - I lied about my age this week.

I only lied to an online form...it isn't like I looked someone in the eyes and knocked 10 years off my age...but still. I did it. And it felt right. And I'm going to continue the practice until I can't get away with it anymore.

People always tell me that I don't look my age.
(I attribute this to a chubby Polish face: The fat fills in the wrinkles).

I certainly don't feel my age. And God and everyone knows I don't behave like many women my age.

So why should I let The Number dictate how people perceive me?

Sooooo...a few days ago I was registering for...something, I don't remember what (okay now the memory thing is something I can't fake)...and I had to offer up my DOB.

As I hovered over the *correct* year, I just couldn't click on it. It seemed WAY too far away. In the DISTANT past. As in, none of my current professional peers were born in that decade. So I kept scrolling and changed that six to a seven.

And I'll do it again. Hell, my hair color is my choice, why should my age be any different?

10 comments:

c.a. Marks said...

LOLOL You rock!

Governor Jen said...

That's because it's none of their damn business. And my philosophy is, as long as they keep making the younger ones so gorgeous (ie Taylor Lautner), they are asking to be ogled.

Kelly @ Dare to be Domestic said...

Just say no to ageism! You go girl!

Le laquet said...

I had to fill in some forms with one of my students today - she was born in my fifth working year!! It makes me shudder :o( I'm lying about my age to everyone!

The Peach Tart said...

Well I'm in the decade before you so I think I should try that trick too.

Baby Boy said...

in order to balance out the universe, while filling out a form today i added 10 years to my age. Catastrophe avoided.

Melissa said...

It is freaky, isn't it? I've started teaching a cello student. I could be this kid's mother. And then he "friended" me.

Nina said...

Aahh, color your hair cause you like it that way, and I'd just tell the truth. If your knees creak, it's cause you've spent your life helping others, and that required some movement on your part, ya know? If you've got wrinkles, it's cause you've spent time on some awesome sunny beaches. I figure I'll have lived myself a good life, and enjoyed all of it if I make it far enough to look back! Not to mention, you know a lot more than you did then, and you know just how to use that information. The youn'uns don't. Just a thought.

Malisa said...

Hey, whatever floats your boat! As for me, I like to tell my real age because I LOVE it when people are shocked! Vain? NO! Just enjoying the ride!

Valerie said...

See, people always think I'm lying about my age, and I SWEAR I'M NOT!! I'm told that looking younger than I am will come in handy in about 10 years, but when you're 28 and you look 16 it's really just annoying.

Totally agree with the RP thing, by the way. Is there any other reason to go to the movies anymore?