If you were here a couple of years ago, you remember my introduction to the public school system after an extended absence. The Nice Kid had been there a couple of weeks when I got a letter, explaining to me that I had not been sending written excuses for my child's absences.
Well, DUH. I'm the one who DIDN'T write them. No need for you to point it out.
So I threw it away. Threw the next one, and possibly a third, away, too. I AM THE PARENT. I don't have to tell you where my child is...what is this? Big Brother? Unless she's in trouble or offending you or breaking some rules, your only concern is her education. Don't be sending The Mama letters!
Then, they sent...something. I think it was a summons to a parenting court, for me to explain where my child had been. BACK TO MY ORIGINAL POINT: I KNOW where my child has been. I. AM. THE. PARENT. When I consider it necessary for YOU to know? I'll let you in on the secret but in the meantime...don't be stalking my child.
Anyway, threw THAT in the trash, too. I mean, they couldn't be talking to ME. No one had called, and they sure as hell had no problem calling when they needed nine cakes, or a vegetable tray, or someone to drive to an out-of-town school event. And besides...this is ME. The child of educators...teacher, assistant principal, librarian, superintendent, school board president. ME. The kid who has witnessed everything there is to be seen...firsthand.
Then came a summons to Parenting Class. For a fee, payable by me, I was to show up on the other side of town on Monday nights for a couple of weeks for parenting classes.
PARENTING CLASSES? I've been raising kids for THIRTY YEARS next Monday, haven't killed one yet and accidentally ended up doing it for a career and you want me to do WHAT?????
I called the District Attorney, a fellow school parent and a frequent guest at our family parties. I called the family court judge, who grew up with The Big Boy, playing Little League and Boy Scouts. Who was one of my dad's students, and who had married one of my mom's students.
Neither one did anything for two days, which is how long it took for them to stop rolling around on the floor laughing. Then, the juvenile court guy called and apologized. He explained some things. He laughed at my letter, and then laughed at my indignation and my predicament. He explained that there were even less-appropriate parents in my position. I probably offered to make him a strawberry cake, or might have invited him to my 19th Annual Gingerbread House Party. Or to a Blood Drive in my yard, or a yard sale I was hosting for a family who had lost everything in a fire. You know...all the things Menaces to Society such as myself do.
It ended well. Never heard from them again. Kept being the person who never volunteers for anything, who everyone calls at the last minute. The parent with "sucker" written across her forehead.
TNK left middle school last year. Started high school this fall.
Guess what I got in the mail this week?
An aside here...no...a possible ending. For years, while my dad was chairman of the county board of education, he wrote a newsletter. Primarily reporting the board's agenda, rulings and business. Spiked with his own opinions, which weren't necessarily those of the mainstream. The mainstream did EVERYTHING it could to stop that newsletter; one of the greatest quotes of all time was an assistant superintendent pointing out that the board could have gone to Las Vegas for a convention, except my dad would put it in the newsletter and people would know. He was even hauled into court once, for using a school copier to print the newsletter, even though he paid the school enough to print its tests and worksheets. He bought a copier and kept writing.
He retired a couple of years ago. Really has nothing to do. Been looking for a cause.
Life would be REALLY interesting if someone showed him what "blogging" is. As opposed to mailouts.
Just IMAGINE the possibilities!!