Kids, I'm losing it.
Many of you probably think I've already lost it but, I assure you, the mental melee you've witnessed over the last nearly-three years is perfectly normal.
Sooo...here's the thing. I have bad dreams. A lot.
Aaaand...they aren't really bad dreams. They're nightmares.
Every. Friggin'. Night. Mares.
Sometimes, when I'm really on my game, I get night terrors, which are absolutely charming. I wake up with all the physical symptoms of actually being terrified.
Poor Hub. YOU try sleeping beside that every night.
:: clean it up boys, that wasn't an invite ::
This is where the mildly humorous portion of my post ends and I actually - maybe for the first time - reach out to all y'all.
So... bad dreams are par for the course when you have an anxiety disorder. Which I do. Which nearly everyone in my family does. It's hereditary.
Let's face it, my maternal great-grandfather - WHO, just for fun, died in an insane asylum - didn't do anyone a favor by passing on these damaged genes.
You'd think that after ::mumble:: years of this abnormality a person would give themselves a good case of hysterical insomnia and avoid sleep.
But not yours truly. I usually fall asleep in .0005 seconds and sleep like the dead. Until, ironically, I dream that I'm dying, at which point I am WIDE awake.
Do I take meds? Seriously? You must be new here. Welcome.
The issue...scratch that. The most recent issue is that said dreams are getting worse. A lot worse. Starting to worry me worse.
I had to contact our good bloggy friend Jen today because she starred in one spectacularly bad dream last night. Which is a first. I usually only nightmare about people I've actually met.
So I'm asking all of you: what do I do? I've changed my evening routine umpteen times: Eat earlier. Eat later. Wine with dinner. No wine with dinner. (PS - that's never the solution). No to red meat and spicy food, yes chamomile tea and yoga...yada yada.
Before I subject myself to medical - or mental - evaluation, does anyone else face this particular challenge? What helps? Anything?
Although, commitment to the ol' Loony Bin is starting to sound pretty good right about now. Because, I seriously need some rest. I wonder if Dziadzia's old bed is free....
Image Credit: http://inobscuro.com/gallery/nightmares-81/