A funny story...

...about people dumb enough to have a conscience ;)

It is possible I've told this Christmas story before...I've heard of me doing that. But yesterday, The Nice Kid was sitting in class when her "Where's My Droid?" app turned on her phone and it started ringing. (An aside here: You're not allowed to have cell phones at school. Mortal sin and they will FRY your ass. However...I don't trust the public school system to look out for my kids so they both carry a cell phone...AND IT DAMN WELL BETTER BE TURNED OFF or you think the SCHOOL is pissed off? Just wait until you get home:) Instead of sitting there looking innocent when the phone went off? TNK BURST into tears and started apologizing and confessing. Dumbass.)

Once upon a time some of my high school's students went to something at the arts center at the local university. And in the middle of the production, my friend Jennifer decided it was in her best interests to set off a firecracker.

It wasn't.

We got back to school and all hell broke loose. And since I was sitting beside her, I got called into the office. Now, I'm a fifth period office worker and my dad is superintendent of schools and there I stand. I looked the principal, who was a member of the local Methodist church with me from the day I was born until the day he died, straight in the eye and I lied my ass off. I didn't SORT of lie...I perjured myself. No, sirree, she did NOT do it. I know...I was sitting there, I'd have seen it, there's no way she did it without my knowing it. Nope. No way, no how. Didn't happen.

So they sent me on my way. And called Jennifer in and I will be damned if she didn't get about two steps inside that office and..."I DID IT! I DID IT! Yes!!! It was me!!!" Crying and apologizing. Confessed to everything...told the whole story. Never even HESITATED...bared her soul. "YEEESSS, it was ME! I'm so sorry! I don't know what I was thinking...I'm so sorry!" On and on, ad nauseum.

Telling the truth. After I have just LIED in front of God and everybody to save her sorry ass. Hey, I'M not dumb enough to set off a firecracker in Norton Auditorium. I AM, however, dumb enough to lie for YOU.

She was the child of sainted parents...they were truly good people and I miss them every day of my life. And one year, she and friend Monica stole two Christmas trees. A childhood prank. Jennifer took it home, they set it up and it RUINED Christmas. Every time she looked at it all she saw was...her mom and a stolen Christmas tree. Her wonderful mama and...a stolen Christmas tree. To this day, we remember that HORRIBLE Christmas. Really good lesson there ;)

I hate it when that happens ;)


Country Girl said…
I don't remember prom, or graduation...but I can tell you every second of this fiasco. Which implies my conscience has been making me miserable for YEARS ;)